bartlebyFamily & Siblings

  • An Apology After We Yell – The Relationship Superglue
    hug apology

    A neighbor posted this story of an overwhelmed mom after she yelled at her kids in the store and then offered an apology.  As a former overwhelmed mom making my way through the holiday crowds with small children, it reminded me of one of the most important ways to get through it - love.

  • Solving Our Morning Routine (Again)

    Our morning routine had been going well for months and then all of a sudden….it wasn’t. The kids were arguing, “The Things” (that's what we call them) weren’t getting done, I was nagging, we were late, we were stressed and we weren’t getting along.

  • The Post-election Parenting Conversation

    Like many children – my children woke wanting to know who had won. When I told them their eyes widened and their mouths dropped and the first question was the one I wasn’t sure how I would answer. I had shielded them from as much of this election as I could, but even a child can tell that Read More...

  • One Simple Change That Helped My Child With Anxiety

    It allows them to think of the best solution for themselves, not for the parent. ( I never would have thought of a schedule because - gag! Not my style!) But this is why it works and is honored by the child - it’s the solution that works for the child as their own person. It IS my son’s style and well, he’s not me. I could have easily imposed something that he “had to” stick to, but because this solution is an intrinsic thought, the follow through is pretty reliable and done with pride and self-awareness.

  • Why Connection Isn’t a Reward for Rude Behavior

    At a time when many parents would sit a child in time out or send them to their room or punish them in some way – I included mine. I did not reward him as some may see it. I reconnected with him and I helped him. I invited him. I gave him quiet acceptance. Instead of replying that, yes, I needed space from him I said just the opposite - “I would love for you to join us. It is so peaceful up there. Let’s go.” And we did. And his mood changed, he relaxed and recovered and talked with us.

  • I Accept The Mess: What Setting Limits Looks Like

    Crying, tantrums, whining, hitting, yelling – it’s all hard.  I’ve worked to accept all these feelings from my children, and yet, it’s still messy.   That’s the way it’s supposed to be – unpredictable, uncomfortable, inconvenient, and definitely messy. My 3 ½-year-old daughter is Read More...

  • Connection and Disconnection: Parenting with Smartphones

    Parents are commonly scolded for using smartphones with their children. While disconnected time with loved ones is vital, it is problematic to say that there is something harmful about ever using mobile devices in front of children. How should a respectful parent approach the issue?